I hope your Memorial Day was better than mine! Tammy and Chris had filled a kiddie pool with delicious looking jello that glistened as it shimmied and shook. I leaned over the pool to scoop a bowl and fell in. I couldn’t get out and the entire party laughed at me while watching me writhe around in the jello, tossing beer cans and half eaten hot dogs at me for a good 2 hours before anyone thought to call for help. Now my kids hate me for “ruining their party”. How was I supposed to know that jello was not meant for consumption?  Why does every family gathering end this way, goddammit?!!